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The Royal Wedding – What about the Royal Marriage?

5/5/2011

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So the big day is over.  What’s next? When I got engaged those many years ago, my boss at the time reminded me that the wedding is just one day while the marriage is meant to last a lifetime. He shared this wisdom while my fiance and I were struggling to bring the two families together.   The British monarchy is certainly counting on a long and happy marriage!  But are the right ingredients in place? What’s different in this marriage to the rather long list of failed royal marriages (Charles & Diana, Prince Andrew, Princess Anne)?
Looking at the broader picture we see that women in the UK now make up the majority of university graduates. They also make up the majority of new solicitors and are predicted to make up 70% of doctors (general practitioners) within the next 5 years. Kate Middleton is part of this quiet revolution. She is the first university-educated woman to take up the role as wife to the heir of the British throne. Education changes everything.

As with any successful relationship, this one depends on the couple’s ability to work as a team and respect each other, even during those trying times.  They certainly appear to have done that even in planning for the wedding as their taste and personalities came through. A team implies two-ways, regardless of which one is blood royalty. Discussion and negotiation will need to prevail. At least the couple doesn’t have to be concerned about how to divide up the household responsibilities!  These will largely be taken care of as part of the perks of the job. The challenge will be sticking to their own principles and style while surrounded by press attention.

Any modern marriage has to recognize that each party brings something to the table, and unless each is allowed to be the best they can be as an individual – ie not suppressing their own sense of being – the relationship is likely to run into trouble. My motto, “The team benefits when you reach for the stars”, equally applies here. One of the reasons people walk away from marriages is they feel unfulfilled. The environment isn’t enabling or motivating them to be the best they can be.

May the couple be blessed with children for the good of the monarchy and the health of their commitment to one another. At the end of the day Kate and William are human, and like us “commoners” a healthy and balanced family life can give you perspective and compassion for those you lead. Marriage isn’t easy, but it can be rewarding if you stick to it, work hard at it, and invest the time. All the best to the Royal Couple!
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